I've been spending so much energy on everything Noah lately, and this morning Joey made me laugh really hard, and I realized...he needs a shout-out, too.
Joey is probably the greatest six-year-old kid I've ever met. He reminds me a lot of one of my favorite people ever, my "baby" cousin John Conor (who is now 22 and lives on his own in Washington DC) because he is sensitive, good-hearted, and loves rules. He reminds my sister of Hermy the Elf from Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, who said, "But I don't want to make toys. I want to be a dentist." Joey doesn't want to be a dentist, but he's not too concerned about what other people think he SHOULD BE doing. He wants to be, and I quote, "A scientist with NO GIRLFRIEND." My dad said that shouldn't be too hard to accomplish.
Joey is also a clone of my some of my more idiosyncratic traits. Namely: Hypochondria. Here are just a few the more hilarious examples.
This morning, brushing his teeth: "Mom, every time I hiccup my butt squeezes and it hurts!"
Yesterday at my mom's...
Joey: "Oh my God!! I just sat on poisonous berries! Now there's poison on my pants!"
Judy: "Joey, those berries are plastic. They're fake. They fell off of something."
Joey (pressing his hands to his eyes): "Oh, THANK GOD. WHEW."
As I wipe his mouth when he's a mess...
Joey: "Is there poison on your hands???"
I know he's asking if I just used Clorox, and I would never put Clorox on my child, but I can't help but say, "Yes. I'm covered in poison and now you are, too."
Driving home from school: "Mom, I was reading my DEAR book, and there was this picture of a man with a rash, and can I GET the rash from touching the book????"
Out in the yard, there was a question of whether my husband touched poison ivy (he didn't). This one was a little my fault, since I kind of freaked out, too. But for days, Joey ran away from his dad, crying, "Don't touch me with your poison hand!!!"
Aside from becoming a scientist, specifically, a "potion maker," Joey has other great aspirations. In no particular order, they include:
1) learning to do "the worm"
2) being on a the Disney Channel show
3) getting his haircut like Wolverine
4) becoming a spy
5) becoming a wizard
6) inventing useful household "contraptions"
7) inventing NOT useful household "contraptions"
8) telling a funny joke
9) learning karate
10) learning to play the guitar
11) saving the world from certain doom
12) owning a robot
Probably Joey's best quality is that he loves me more than anyone. He thinks I'm beautiful and smart and really funny. I know he lives in fear of ever letting me down, but he's so great, I live in fear of ever letting him down, too.
And you know what gives me hope? When Joey was three, he broke things, yelled, refused naps, screamed and/or sang all night long, and did everything I asked him NOT to do. So while I go crazy with Noah, at least this time I have Joey to keep me sane.
"Don't worry, Mom. You're doing a great job. You're the best mom." And I like it best when he adds, "REALLY."