Dr. Joey Says...

Each of my children has a "magic lamp" in his room: a lamp plugged into a timer. In the morning at "Awake Time," the lamp turns on. They believe the lamp is powered by my mind and will. Well, Joey did until he found the timer behind his dresser. That was a sad and disappointing day in our house. A little prelude to the Santa Fiasco that is right around the corner.

Anyway, when the magic lamps turn on, the boys meet in the hall outside their rooms and come downstairs together. Beautifully, they go right by my room and just start playing together. I don't know what wonderful angel watches over me and arranged this, but I fully appreciate it. It also gives me ample opportunity to overhear entertaining conversations that can really only happen between two children.

Yesterday morning, I heard the simultaneous THUMPS from their rooms as their feet hit the floor. Over the monitor that I still use (don't judge, I'll explain that some other time), I could hear them, "Hey, Joey!" "Hey, Noah!"

And then, Noah said (remember, no Ls or Rs), "Ugh, Joey. I had the WORST dream last night."

Joey, his voice dripping in sympathy, replied, "Oh, man. Why don't you tell me about it?"

Noah: "Well, I was in our house, and all the sudden everywhere I looked, everything was pink! It was all I could see, pink everywhere!" 

I happen to know that the afternoon before, they had watched the Dennis the Menace movie, and in that movie was a scene where Dennis loads a shop vac with cotton candy mixture, and it explodes all over the Mitchell yard. Or maybe Mr. Wilson's yard. No matter. The point is, there was pink everywhere and there's a good chance Noah didn't even dream this, he just remembered that part of the movie and wanted to talk about it.

But then there was Joey. Joey's voice became deep and grave with his response, "Oh, Noah, that's terrible. Don't panic. I think this means you have pinkeye."

Noah wailed. "PINKEYE? What's that??"

Joey: "I think it's when everything you see is pink."

Noah: "But I don't want pinkeye!"

Joey: "Well, I think you have it. You better not touch me at all."

Both boys: "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!"